The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck series, Book 1
Mark Manson
Harper
Nonfiction, Self-Help
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Description
Accentuate the positive! Start each day with a smile! Everyone is extraordinary if they just let themselves be! Seek joy in all things at all times! Don't see the obstacles! Never give up! And if all else fails, buy this self-help retreat, or that product, or both! With all the motivational messages and admonitions against negative feelings or failures flying around these days, it's a wonder the world isn't chock full of literal superheroes by now, spontaneously combusting with enough extraordinary energy to outshine the sun... but it isn't, and despite the vast material comforts and opportunities available to many, we're possibly the most miserable, least satisfied generation ever. Maybe we're just not thinking enough happy thoughts, or reciting enough self-love affirmations in our mirror - or maybe, by avoiding all talk and experience of negative emotions and failures and sometimes-unpleasant self examinations, we're robbing ourselves of the vitally important experiences that lead to true growth and more fulfilled lives. Maybe we're just trying to give too many fucks about too many things that don't ultimately matter. Author and personal growth advisor Mark Manson offers advice without the shiny happy warm fuzzies.
Review
There is an epidemic of positive thinking and self-esteem-over-self-growth messaging in the world today, not at all
helped by social media and how it distorts perceptions: everyone else looks like they're either having the best time
ever with the most positive hashtags or are the most picked-on and unlucky soul ever to emerge from the primordial ooze
(and more hashtags), making everyone else feel awkward and inadequate and unable to compete on either end of the
spectrum. Manson may not be the first to challenge this thinking, but he does it effectively, with more than a few curse
words and verbal smacks across the face, along with some humor. All this positive thinking, he successfully argues, are
distracting at best and harmful at worst. Failure and pain are essential to human growth and maturity, and things we need
to learn how to cope with and learn from rather than avoid or cast blame about, but too many voices in society are urging
us to reject this vital experience, even to feel shame or guilt for not always being happy or successful. Heck, many of
us struggle to even tangibly define what success or happiness mean to us outside of parameters we've been trained to value
by outside influences... or to redefine those terms when our previous ideas failed to come to fruition, or came to
fruition and didn't bring us what we expected. Picking battles, picking where to invest our limited supply of fucks, is
necessary. He even emphasizes the importance of coming to grips with our inevitable mortality as a part of personal growth,
the one end-point none of us can predict or avoid.
As with many self-help books, he glosses over some pitfalls that can trap people (lack of money, for instance, or being
stuck in repressive or abusive communities), but all in all he offers some solid food for thought.